MMMMMM........ MY EFFORT MADE ME LOOK LIKE A FOOL ACTUALLY NOT THEM!!
Soccerthon 3 was around the corner and I was in-charge of the registration of soccer teams. For yr info Soccerthon3 is a school project meant to collect donations for the school's development. The aim was to get RM100,000. Every RM1000 collected by a class would enabled them to form a soccer team and additional team costs them anor RM500.
The climax was of course the Soocerthon day which was held yesterday (Saturday 30, 2010). There were 74 teams and the match took 2 days to finish. World cup with 32 teams pun ... took 1 month to finish but taman sea "74" teams took only for 2 days!!!
The hard working referees
Okay lah... so in what way did I made my superiors looked like a bunch of fools???
My making my 'own rules' which was minuted in the PTA meeting. The issue was I allowed my form sixers to join class in order to form a team which meant that 6AK could combine source and power with 6BK; 6AM with 6AB, 6AS with 6AT, and 6BS with 6BT. Basically they were combined according to their block classes because of small number of students in a class. But there is only 1 physics class so 6BK had to combine with their seniors 6AK. However, according to a senior assistant, no class was allowed to combine their sum of donation but was allowed to combine to form a team.
So.....to defend myself and my decision, I asked my other superiors regarding the issue... and was to promised that they'd talk to the other senior. To my surprise ... it seemed that when my superior talked to anor superior who question my 'decision', he told him that there was no problem with it. ALAMAK!!!!!!! Tapi tadi beria-ia marah I depan cikgu lain!!!! "Hanim.... kenapalah hanim suka buat keputusan sendiri!!!" So.... why must I go and see all my other superiors asking for help when there is no problem. It seemed that I made a big fuss out of a small issue....
My immediate superior called me to her office to ask about this issue ... which she said (mungkin juga pendapat dia) "You made us look like a bunch of fools". And when she mentioned that... anor teacher was there and she heard that statement. She herself was shocked to hear it... I could see how surprised she was ... her mouth was wide open and even a bird could fly into her mounth. She herself could not believe her ears. I'm glad that she heard that btw. It gave me a shock too and confused!!!!
I told boss everything ... and she listened. Obviously, he was twisting his own words!!! In the eyes of the superiors.... I made them looked like a bunch of fools. But after talking to my immediate senior, we came to a conclusion that... it was actually me that look like a fool. She said "Yes, you look bad here".
We did talk in private too.... regarding my so called prestasi .....
and the question was.....
"Do you know why your Bomba and your Ketua tingkatan was taken away from you?"
Daringly i said.... "Yes, according to the admin, i was not doing a good job!"
"How do you know? it was supposed to be a secret."
"Yes but secret leaks. whether in the office or the canteen talk... secret leaks. But may I ask.... What do you expect from a baby??? To run immediately??? I was not given a chance to show my baby's development for she was taken away from me. Ask this teacher.... until today i am still helping Bomba.
"You are not monitoring your students"
And you say that I'm not monitoring my students.... ask yourself who is always with the students in this school??!! I have nothing to do with Muafakat Camp but I was there from morning to evening to be with them. Is that fair when u want to see my progress but you took it away from me."
"Hanim, you are a teacher with full of ideas but it is only on paper... "
"Yes... you acknowledge me as a talented and innovative teacher but what kind of administrators you have when one said: hanim... no matter how good your action research would be I'm not sending this to the jabatan or PPD. Administrators are meant to supervise... to guide but not to chuck one's talent away!! I had all my paperworks for my ketua tingkatan with one of the admins and we went through it 1 by 1... so... am i doing my work alone??? No i did not!!! Your actions would definitely demotivate me and at the end i will ended up just like other teachers with less dreams. Do read my paperworks. Do not chuck it at the corner... tell me to improvise my paperwork but not give negative feedback. No encouragement at all. When I was a bit active.... there were people who wish to stop me from being active. How would you feel when someone from other school came up to you and said : is your relationship with this person ok for the person had said unpleasant thing to us abt you in a state level meeting??!!! "
"Mmmm is it a he or she....? But how are we to supervise?? There are lots of teachers here? You cannot expect them to guide each and everyone of you".
"It is some how your duty to do so."
"And I heard that you do not finish your syllabus".
"Yes, I'm slow for I will teach them again and again. I'll make my students understand. I do not simply Photostat and give them read on their own and give them exercises without guidance. If I did that, definitely I could easily finish the syllabus".
"But you are spoon feeding them! You are not helping when they go to universities."
"They are weak.... what do you expect?? Even by spoon feeding them they do not excel in their studies... You have to teach... they need to be guided and they are still in school. BTW, there were students who wanted to lodge a complaint against a teacher who does not teach but I stopped them for i did not want them to tarnish the teacher's name. So.. teaching slowly is not wrong... I do finish my syllabus b4 the xzam". What i wanted to say..... not to teach is wrong.... Hmmmm sapa lah yang suka fotostet and tidak mengajar tu yer!!!
That was what happened to me last Friday..... It was really a hot seat for me!! But in a way i am so relieved for i manage to tell out my feelings to my small bo. Dah lama simpan dalam hati.... kes 4 tahun dulu pun dah lepas diceritakan.... wah ...lega :D
Apa-apa pun... nilah asam garam kerja...
Ada orang pernah dipanggil kerana ditegur cuba mendapatkan bantuan dalam sesutu tugasan... Mintak tolong dan menolong pun salah. Tapi orang yang tak buat apa-apa kerja tu... tak pulak dipanggil untuk query. Haiiih
Apa apa pun juga.... Aku gembira kerana ramai yang merada di belakangku untuk menyokong.
Apa-apa pun... ini adalah luahan perasaan.......
Terima kasih semua.